Things to Remember While Coping With the Death of Parents

Undoubtedly, parents are an integral part of the life of every human being. While a mother cares for, loves and plays the role of a teacher for the overall development of a child, a father is like a pillar and offers the feeling of physical and emotional security.

So, losing any one of them brings an immeasurable emptiness that none can meet. Grieving the loss of a parent is more painful than anything, although everyone faces this situation at some time. To know the ways for coping with the death of a parent, keep reading.

Feel Your Emotions When they Arise

There is a general tendency among people to suppress their pain and sorrow as a normal response to their state of grief. Even though it is an effort to stay strong, it is usually not a good solution since you are not providing yourself sufficient space to come to terms with your feelings.

Masking your feelings or hiding them can convert your unaddressed emotions and thoughts into anger, guilt, shock, despair, frustration etc. Such feelings can be extremely harmful to your physical and mental health and can affect your family, professional and social life. Involving yourself in different activities can get you some relief from your pain.

However, it is still vital for you to feel the emotions and express your pains in different ways like crying, recalling joyful moments, talking with loved ones, etc. By doing so, you can cope with this saddened situation and get emotionally strong.

Build a Healthy Support System

Another helpful way by which you can cope with the grief of losing your parents is by creating a support system. You can share your feelings with your family members or a good friend who can give value to your feelings. Also, you can meet any of your close relatives or friends who also have lost their parents shortly or have gone through the same pain that you are presently dealing with.

Furthermore, if your mental state is going out of control, instead of depending solely on your own efforts, consulting a counsellor is a sensible choice. Teenagers or middle-aged adults losing a parent can get adequate support and necessary medications while taking help from a counsellor or psychiatrist.

Write a Letter to Your Parent

Even in your grief, you have to accept the reality that when someone departs from the world, they leave forever. There might be a possibility that when someone passes away, there was something that you could not have expressed to them about your feelings or thoughts related to any issue. This is a common instance in case of an estranged parent. 

This makes you left heartbroken as you will now get no chance to converse or settle any past arguments once they pass away. For this, the best solution is to write a letter to your parents about your feelings, regret, forgiveness for anything you have done in the past but did not tell them, and so on. This way, you can vent out feelings that come from the deepest part of your heart.

Organise Something Special on the Anniversary of Your Parent’s Demise

Spending the first year without a parent during festivals, Father's Day or Mother's Day can be extremely upsetting. This is why planning anything special for their loving memories on these specific days or their death anniversary can return a smile to your face. 

For this, you can simply light a candle, make their favourite meal, decorate your house, wear their favourite clothes, spend time with the family remembering the deceased person’s memories, and so on. On their birthdays, you can invite your relatives and friends and share different stories about your parents or any adorable memory with them. This will help you slowly but surely deal with the pain.

Keep Your Parent Alive in Your Heart

Accept from the core of your heart that although your parent has left the world physically, they will remain alive in your memories forever. This is another healing approach for your tears and sorrow after your parent's demise. To keep their loving memories intact in your mind, you can keep their photographs, mementos, your childhood pictures with them, awards, and so on.

Furthermore, you can put on their garments and clothes to recall their love, affection, and warmth. In addition, you may plant your parent’s favourite flowering plant in the garden, read their favourite books, watch their favourite movies, colour your room with their favourite colour, and so on.

Spent Some Moments Alone to Minimise Your Grieve

If your parent expires due to a fatal illness, it is quite natural that plenty of questions will arise in your mind. It can be 'Why did this happen to them?', 'Why is God so cruel that they got such a disease?' etc. There is often a general misconception about grief that an individual gets through it and recovers automatically with time.

However, it is not so easy. Coming across a severe mental shock and suffering takes a long time to heal. To deal with this matter, you can spend some time alone to feel your grief entirely, read a book you may like, etc. Furthermore, if you feel like crying, cry without holding back. By doing so, you can get some relief from the pain.

While coping with the grief of losing your loving parent, you need to consider some key pointers as stated below:

• Get sufficient sleep ranging between 7 to 9 hours each night on average.
• Eat when you are hungry and avoid skipping meals.
• Drink at least five to six litres of water everyday.
• Regularly carry out some exercises in the morning to stay active and energised.
• Avoid smoking and intake of alcohol since they can cause various health problems.
• Develop hobbies if you haven’t already like gardening, photography, painting, music, and so on.
• Do some deep-breathing exercises and meditation to keep a proper balance of mind.
• Consult a counsellor or psychiatrist if you are facing too much difficulty to manage the grief.

Losing parents is the utmost pain that everyone faces in their lifetime. There is no power that can bring them back. This pain of losing your parents will remain in your heart till the last breath. However, you have to accept the reality that you are not alone who have lost a parent. So, for coping with the death of a parent, consider the above discussions thoroughly, and move on in your life.