Breaking Bad News to Parents on Your Health

Preparing Yourself Emotionally and Mentally

Before you talk to your parents, being mentally and emotionally prepared is important. This means:

• Understanding Your Own Emotions
• Are you feeling scared, sad, or anxious?
• Do you feel guilty about worrying them?
• Are you afraid of how they will react?

Accepting your feelings will help you approach the conversation with a clear mind.

Gathering the Necessary Information

Your parents will likely have many questions. Be ready with:

• Your diagnosis (if applicable)
• What it means for your daily life
• Possible treatments and outcomes
• Steps you are taking to manage your condition

Having answers can help them feel a little more in control of the situation. Avoid times when they are stressed, busy, or already dealing with another problem. You want to make sure they have the mental space to absorb what you’re telling them.

How to Deliver the News?

Communicate the information in a clear and timely fashion. Parents often feel they were informed of their children’s terrible news too late. Consider the phrasing of words and sentences while delivering sensitive or bad news. Doing so shows empathy and compassion, thus, allowing parents to deal with the news in a better way. Try using ‘I’ to start sentences while delivering bad news, such as:

• I have something important to talk about…
• I wish I had some other news…
• I am afraid I have…
• I fear that…

In addition, one should genuinely answer their parents’ questions and tend to their concerns. So be clear and direct but gentle, considering their emotions. Also, avoid using overly complicated medical jargon. Keep it simple and to the point. 

For example: "I’ve been diagnosed with [condition]. It means [briefly explain], and I’m working with my doctor to manage it."

Pause and let them process before continuing. Since parents can have a variety of emotions upon hearing the news, one must take their emotions and feelings into account while delivering such news. Allow parents to have some space to themselves if they want to. This lets the fact of the matter sink in and helps parents absorb it better. Cater to their rage, tears, and outbursts with gentle care.

Discuss Financial Security

Health issues not only bring emotional stress but also financial concerns. Even if you have medical insurance, unexpected costs can arise. Your parents may worry about how you will manage financially, especially if your condition affects your ability to work. Keep them updated about your: 

• Health Insurance

Inform them that you have adequate health insurance to cover treatments, medications, and hospital stays. If your parents are involved in your finances, let them know what your insurance covers.

• Emergency Fund

If you have set aside savings for unexpected expenses. This will reduce stress and prevent you from relying entirely on family support.

• Life Insurance

Your parents may worry about what will happen if your condition worsens. Keep them informed about your existing term insurance plans that offer lump sum payout if you are diagnosed with a serious illness. This can help cover medical bills, loss of income, or other expenses.

What Not to Do?

Here are a few things one should not do while delivering bad news to parents:

• Do Not Beat About the Bush

Get straight to the point without beating the bush while maintaining composure. It is always better to rip off a band-aid than to pull it off slowly. People should be clear and direct while giving their parents unfortunate news about their health. It is never a good idea to tell only a part of the whole situation, thus hiding facts and information.

• Do Not Joke Around

Cracking jokes when conveying tragic news is inconsiderate and can come across as impolite. It might be challenging for specific individuals to resist since it is natural to attempt to lighten up an adverse circumstance using comedy. Yet, one should refrain from doing so, by all means, to prevent seeming callous.

Before people inform about their miserable health conditions, they should think about how they are going to deliver the news and prepare for any likely questions they may face. Parents need time to prepare themselves for the long anxiety-inducing wait for the terrible outcome of the news. 

This is particularly the case while addressing one's critical health condition to parents who are pretty senior. Any bad news regarding an ageing parent’s child can adversely affect the parent. Therefore, try using supportive and soothing phrases to console them.